One of the things that children need to feel is a sense of belonging, and that they are needed. In the parenting videos, Active Parenting Session 4, it mentions that children need to have responsibility. This responsibility can be given in many ways including:
- A Family Garden
- Daily Chores
- Choices on Decisions Made in the Home
- Follow Ups
Family gardens may seem like a lot of work (and it probably is!) but it is a great way to give a child responsibility of something other than the things that he/she has in possession. i.e. personal toys, musical instruments, etc. Giving them the responsibility of watering, hoeing, weeding, or picking the vegetables will help them to understand the love of work, and blessings that come from that work. i.e. food.
Chores help as well. When a child has something that he is accountable for like making his/her bed everyday, washing dishes, or other chores that may fit, teach them to start caring about the things that they have contact with. One thing that I love about chores is that I don't think children should do chores by themselves. It is a great opportunity to get to know your child better, and create conversation that may not have been mentioned at the dinner table. It may not have to be a parent, but it can be a sibling or someone else that is close with the child.
Involving children with decisions made around the house, like what color to paint a room, where should you put the vase of flowers, and how many stones to line your driveway with, will help them to feel needed in the home. Following up on their chores, and making sure that these things get done is crucial. We need to do it lovingly and firmly if a child resists. This follow up, followed up with positive feedback when substantial effort has been portrayed will help the child feel like he is a contributing member in the home.
We all have needs, and we all need responsibility, so let's give our children responsibilities to feel needed.
*Jacob 2
*Alma 39-42
*Mormon 8
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