This week in class we focused on how families react in times of trial. I know that we all go through hard things, but that doesn't mean we can't gain more knowledge, learn something new, learn self-control, and live a happier life.
In our book that we are reading, it mentions an equation that we follow when we go throughout a life trial; it's called the ABC=X equation. (Rueben Hill) The A- stands for the actual event that has taken place. These could include death of someone in the family, rape, incest, drug and alcohol abuse, or any other stressor that is placed on the family. The B is both resources/responses that a family may have. What I love most about this one is that not all resources are tangible. Heavenly Father is the backbone to all of our problems, and even though we may not see him, we can feel his Spirit. The C is cognition. This is simply the way we look at a situation. Is it positive, negative, or anywhere else on the continuum of emotions. And finally, the X it the total eXperience that we take away from our trial.
I mention this method to help us understand that we all have tribulations, and we all have different ways with dealing with them. While some of our resources may vary, we all have help available to us. Help may not need to be professional help from a doctor, but knowing simple techniques can help us to overcome our doubts. The first step is making sure that our outlook is positive.
There are three ways in which we can handle a problem, first being having a higher maturity level and growing from the experience. The second one is staying on the same level as before, we cope but we don't learn or gain new insight from our trial. The third is achieving a lower level than when the trial happened, this can be having a long term reaction like addiction, depression, or unhappiness. We all have the same opportunity to learn, and through hard work can make us stronger individuals.
Once we have this positive outlook, work on taking responsibility for what happened. Even though it may be a rape that has taken place, it is not healthy to play an innocent victim. Bad things happen, but at the end of the tunnel there is always light. Taking responsibility will help us to accept what has happened, but also find ways to improve our life at that time. Acknowledge your self worth. You are a beautiful daughter, or son of God who loves you. Rely on him.
Balance your self-concern with "others" concern. Keep your mind on always helping others, but at the same time find ways to help yourself. Know when too much is too much, and have time to meditate upon the blessings you have received in your life. Lastly, redefine the meaning of life. Something bad happened. Now what? Take time to see where your life has the potential to go, and go after it. It won't be easy, but with time and commitment it will come.
Life is a precious thing that we have all been blessed with. We have happy moments, and not so happy ones, but in the end it is your life, and you have the ability to mold it. It may jumble, and get all wacky when something happens but that's ok. With the right tools and care, it will be put back into that mold only this time with more character than before. We have the means of accomplishing great things through our trials, so take the time to make that happen.
No comments:
Post a Comment